Tam awoke many times the night before his meeting with his project manager. Twice he’d dreamt about his sister, and both times it was discomforting. He couldn’t recall the details but could vaguely sense what he was feeling. Both dreams were like an obstacle course or goose chase, and never did he find her, only searched frantically through areas thick with lush plants. After the second dream he awoke in a sweat and finally gave up on legitimate resting. He rolled over and tapped the switch on his eClock.
“Goood morning,” cooed a soothing voice. Tam had gone through a painstaking thirty voice choices before he settled on this woman’s deep and relaxing tone as the voice that would come through the speakers installed in the walls of his bedroom.
“Today is Friday the 3rd of June, 2101. Your first appointment is at 10 a.m. The location: HSA headquarters. Your second and last appointment is at 7 p.m. The location: Old Fusion Restaurant in midtown.”
In the thirty years that passed since Tam first stepped outside, he made it his ultimate goal to fight the system the proper way.
The day he walked outside of his parents’ home as a child, ended up being the day that his older sister, Rosemarie, ran away for good. He remembered the day vividly. Rosemarie’s participation in the protest event was not minor. Tam discovered this that night, when he was eight years old. Rosemarie dragged him by the ear to the door of their parents’ home. Their parents were, in general, aloof and reticent people. Until it came to their attention that Tam had gotten out of the house and Rosemarie was attached to him, wearing her homemade riot gear. Their mother had her suspicions about Rosemarie and found some clues in her daughter’s bedroom. Their parents transformed into brutes. Tam and Rosemarie were thrown into their bedrooms and locked in. They forgot about Tam while they disciplined Rosemarie by interrogating her for a full day. Tam did not eat for sixteen hours. No one came to his room at all. Tam mistook this oversight as his severe punishment. When he emerged from his bedroom, his sister had as well. Rosemarie looked like a prisoner of war fresh out of captivation. The family then sat together for what would be their last meal all together. Their mother was distant once again. She politely informed Tam that Rosemarie was going away to a special school for a while. She was being punished and going away to the school. Their mother said this as if it were a happy occasion.
The next morning Rosemarie was gone.
“Reminder.” Tam flinched. He’d been dozing in a half-sleep thinking about the past. Tam was meeting Rosemarie for his second appointment of the day, dinner in midtown. They didn't reconnect until after he graduated from his second university.
“Reminder.” Tam pushed a button, located on the side of his nightstand. “First appointment in less than two hours.” He was morose now thinking of that day and his family. It didn’t seem right to him that he was a child the last time they’d all been together. He was now thirty-eight years old. Their parents died when he was in college. Initially after Rosemarie left, Tam thought she’d gone about things all wrong. She never returned home again and it didn’t seem to affect their mom, but their father was never the same. His hair went grey and he became very anxious and jumpy for the rest of his days. Tam always wished Rosemarie didn’t cause them such grief and she would just come back already.
Tam became focused on school. He finished from an ivy league university which was necessary to even apply for the HSA (Humanitarian Services Agency). Of the hundreds of thousands of applicants each year, only one hundred were selected. Tam’s parents had just died when he received his acceptance letter from the HSA.
The agency had a rigorous program that kept Tam busy for years. For the first fifteen years, he was part of the Progressive Initiators, this was the designation given by the agency. It was an aid organization. His first appointment of the day was the cause of him losing sleep the night before. Tam was very excited. He’d been asked by the HSA to participate in a time-traveling experiment. Which was in effect a grand promotion. He had the honor of being inducted into the Progressive Superiors, which consisted of the top-level of positions at the agency.
Despite his lazy morning he arrived to his meeting at headquarters, fifteen minutes ahead of schedule. Fifteen years ago, the agency’s headquarters were relocated to East New York, Brooklyn. It was part of a need to expand, they followed suit on the newest real estate trend of constructing the building on the water itself. The building stood twenty-one stories high.
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Tam looked up as he heard brisk footsteps approaching. There was a pause before a door opened into the lobby and a young man emerged. He looked flustered and sweaty. He faltered and almost tripped over Tam.
“Alright?” Tam asked him. But he was consumed with his thoughts. The young man only straightened his tie and pushed the button for the elevator. He hadn’t even heard Tam. He was gone by the time a softer, lighter set of footsteps came rushing to the door. Tam nearly stood expecting it to be for him. A young woman emerged for a split second before she went back in and disappeared.
After five minutes a heavier set of footsteps came to the door and a man appeared,
“Tam.” He smiled while Tam stood and they shook hands.
“Hello.”
“Right this way.” Tam was lead through the door to another elevator. A double-beep occurred and the agent lifted his thumb to press it against a sensor. A triple-beep occurred and the man said,
“Jones,” to pass the voice sensor. The double-beep sounded again indicating it was Tam’s turn. And he proceeded. The elevator door opened and they entered. He recognized Jones from the interview he’d attended to qualify for this project. Tam was ecstatic to be chosen for this project. It was very risky, but there’d already been tests performed. So far the HSA had found effective means to not harm the agent going back in time. It took the agency many years of testing and many casualties before they were able to perfect getting a person to live through the journey in the vehicle. Tam was part of the newest set of experiments. It was very expensive and top officials suspected there would be nothing beneficial from it but it was deemed highly important to test the effects of changing things in the past and seeing how they effect the future.
“So, Wells, you must be nervous?” Tam was surprised Jones addressed him by his last name. Calling by the last name was the only mild affection he'd picked up on since his promotion.
“Excited more than anything, Sir.”
“Yes it is.”
The elevator doors opened and Tam was lead down a long hallway with no doors or windows. There was another fingerprint and voice activation to enter the conference room. Once inside he saw the same young woman who’d searched for the man in the lobby. Also seated was Inspector Raleigh. There were only five inspectors in the agency. Most agents could work over forty years and never meet with an inspector.
All in the conference room stood and shook hands before being seated along the large rectangular shaped conference table. Most likely only Raleigh and Tam would be speaking in the meeting, but agent Jones and the young woman remained present and silent. Another feature of his promotion to the Superiors was this strange way of running meetings. Their silent presence made him very uncomfortable. Raleigh spoke.
“This meeting has been called so that we can make things official in the books. The prior meetings were heavily instructional and technical.” There were a few minor points on the meeting's agenda. Raleigh leapt to the first item without any small talk, or genuine conversation.
“So let’s begin by focusing on the package itself. Once you’ve placed the package in the specified location, you’ll need to be in the vicinity, in public at a café, observing. You’d be best off saying you’re a writer, if locals inquire, and they will, remember at this time in India they are excessively curious. You’re a white man and this will stand out anywhere. Don’t assume you’ll blend in with the excessive population.
Once again, do not feel curious about what is in the package, it will destruct if you tamper with it. It is imperative that the agent has no knowledge of what is in the package.
Okay, so once you’ve placed the package you’ll need to spend a total of ten days sitting at the café observing members of the party. Look out for slightly mental behaviors, sicknesses, and lethargy. Pay attention to whether the party members cancel meetings. Things like this.” Raleigh was breezing through the agenda, and as a courtesy would say, "Please interject with any questions." Tam took him up on it.
“I've been briefed countless times, but I wonder sir, just how detrimental could the package's contents be? What is the worst case scenario?” Raleigh chuckled,
“Wells, that is precisely what you’re to determine,” he had the slightest sense of humor.
“Look, don’t mind any detriment, we have the technology to bring you back and erase your presence from the past. A Redo, if you will. You shouldn’t fear what the package will do to the Indian people because any damage will be repaired. And conversely any good that comes from the package will be destroyed. Basically, no matter what, you’re entire experience will be erased from the past.
Frankly, it's sort of weird you'd ask that question," he said, but he had a casual way of saying something so uncomfortable.
"Do you understand Wells?” Raleigh asked him. Tam’s face had given him away. He’d been confused about the necessity of saying he was a writer if the entire experience was to be wiped.
“Yes.” Tam had been full of naïve excitement about the fact that he would get to go back in time. To a purer land, where sunlight was taken for granted and was in abundance. He’d been overwhelmed with all the material he had to learn. In the year prior, he was tested extensively on the material. He’d read it all over thousands of times. It only made sense to him when he the materials he'd read mentioned, The agent performing the mission shall have no knowledge of the package’s contents. (This is to protect the objectivity of the experiment.) Tam, for the first time, felt uneasy.
The excessively cold demeanor of all present made Tam even more nervous about the package’s contents.
“Okay then,” Raleigh said, with slight cheer in his voice, “I’ll have to read the liability aloud with these two witnesses present. Agreed?”
“Yes.”
“Tam Wells, good luck and we at the Humanitarian Services Agency deem you certified to perform this exciting new mission.
Tam Wells, do you understand the penalty of death should you choose to defect?”
“Yes, I do.”
“You are certified,” Raleigh said with a wry smile, “Welcome.” He winked at Tam.
“You’ll just have to be seated next to our liaison from the legal agency,” Raleigh said while pointing to the young woman.
“Alright then, good luck.” He left the room with haste. Jones and the young woman remained. Raleigh’s matter-of-factness made Tam anxious. He assumed there would be more of production about the mission, it was a huge risk to even get through travel in the machine itself. It was more taxing on the body than any of the traveling in space.
Instead the time elapsed with Raleigh was under ten minutes, and for the next two painful hours, Tam and the legal liaison went through a mind-bending set of liability clauses requiring Tam’s signature and fingerprint.
Tam left the agency headquarters in a daze. He had four hours to kill before meeting Rosemarie for dinner. Without thinking, he went to his favorite museum, The Ret. During his tram ride he began stewing over the details. The most dangerous part of the mission was the travel itself. Once there, whatever was done was not a threat because there was technology available that could in essence erase Tam from the past. The travel was at such a high velocity, no human could endure the travel without periodic shots of adrenaline. Even the fittest person required extensive physical training. Tam would be placed in a body holster, held tightly in place by straps and belts. The adrenaline would automatically be given at intervals throughout the travel. Once he landed he would be exposing himself to the atmosphere of 150 years earlier. It would be Mumbai, India and there would be an entirely different set of bacteria that Tam’s immune system might not withhold. The travel took twenty-four hours and then once in the year 1965, he would have to sequester himself in a posh clean hotel for another twenty-four hours.
Throughout his training and preparations Tam felt it was an amazing program and all bases were covered. They did harp on certain things more than others. Defecting was something obsessively covered, Tam felt. Defecting ended in death. This statement was made to him in slightly varied forms incessantly. There was a 40% chance he would not make it through the time travel. This statement was made to Tam once. Both end in death. For the first time, in his years of service Tam was aware of his own ineffectuality in the eyes of the agency. He was an end to a means.
Then he began his work as a Progressive Initiator, he immediately felt camaraderie. The Initiators were not involved in secretive missions. Their programs gave aid to foreign poverty-stricken countries. This kind of aid was the face of the HSA around the world, so there was no need for secrecy at all. There were fundraisers, employee parties, press conferences and seminars. Once inducted into the Progressive Superiors, his profession took a sharp turn. It was much lonelier. Guidelines of the mission required that Tam lose contact with his old colleagues for the six months leading up to the mission. Also part of his promotion was added surveillance on Tam. The agency had to ensure his silence about the mission, which seemed strange to Tam considering he took an oath. Still on paper it made sense, Surveillance is a necessary measure to ensure that the agent doesn’t inadvertently release clues or hints. There is a high chance of the compulsion to vocalize things newly learned by any human being, but it is generally vocalized unwittingly from the subconscious of the brain into minor conversations.
Tam walked the museum with a listless stare as thoughts raced through his head. Like a drunk who’d driven home and lived to tell about it without a scratch, Tam found himself seated at a table in the Old Fusion Restaurant waiting for Rosemarie. On her arrival he brightened up and for the first time since he’d left the HSA headquarters was able to focus on the present moment.
Rosemarie looked gaunt, her eyes were beady. The server came to take her order and she jolted a bit from her seat.
“Hey? You okay?”
“Yes, yes, just been really stressed. Very stressed. I haven’t been sleeping. I’m sorry to lay right in,” she said while unwrapping her jacket and scarf and seating herself.
“No, no. Please tell me.” Tam was very concerned, he’d never known Rosemarie to be anything but mellow.
“Well you know when I was in Boliviana, with Feed the World?” Tam nodded his head.
“I got let go,” she said.
“Oh no, I’m so sorry to hear that.”
“It didn’t hurt my wallet, believe me.” Rosemarie had been moonlighting between three different humanitarian organizations since she was kicked out of her parents’ home so many years ago. She’d never attended university, but Tam often found it hard to keep up with her. He always thought she should join the grassroots Self-Education movement that was quite powerful among the youths, lately. He knew she was a proponent of it, but he knew she would consider this too minor in the scheme of things. Rosemarie was not the type to chip away at the base of a problem. She could only deal with the extreme outcomes of oppression. She wanted to see firsthand what was going on in the places that people were starving.
“Tam,” she whispered and leaned in now, “Tam, I’m actually a bit scared. I’ve been getting some threatening phone calls.”
“What??” She continued in a hushed tone,
“Okay, let me go back. The last campaign I worked on for Feed the World involved us giving the people some vaccines and immunization shots. The shots were bad. They were--” Rosemarie struggled to tell him, she felt her brother to be excessively naïve,
“They weren’t immunizations.”
“How did you know?”
“I saw very strong and bad effects on the people. I thought it was an oversight or a bad reaction they hadn’t factored in. I asked a few questions, got shined off, I took it past my supervisor, just one step up and next thing I know, I’m out.”
“Yeah but it sounds like you're insinuating a scandal.”
“Tam,” she leaned in and whispered, “I took a sample of the vaccine and had it tested. It’s causes organ deficiencies. It’s horrible.”
“Rosemarie, you’re insane. Why would our government do something like that? We’re the leading power we don’t need to stomp on the poor. This is ridiculous. If anything there needs to be a recall.”
“I've worked on other campaigns where there were recalls.” She exhaled a deep breath and looked defeated. Tam sort of softened toward her but his stomach clenched at the thought.
“Where did you get it tested?”
“I got it tested three times,” she said, “I know some lab techs from a campaign I worked on in California.”
“Are they activists now?” He asked skeptically.
“Sort of. Tam, if you’re not gonna listen, forget it. All I know is now I’m getting a scary guy calling, threatening me about things no one could know. Letting me know I’m being followed and traced.” Tam thought she was insane, but he did know of those scientists in California to be reliable.
“How were you able to get them tested without causing alarm?” Rosemarie was somewhat relieved that he was considering believing her, but she knew he’d be skeptical of what she said next.
“I know a guy who defected,” at this Tam looked down and shook his head in total disbelief,
“Right so you’re trusting him?” he said. Tam’s heart was beating. Now that she’d said defect, he suddenly remembered he, and inadvertently Rosemarie, were being watched by the agency.
“Okay, stop harping on that. The fact is that I got a test done and some very powerful people know about it and they’re tracking me.
It’s a terrible feeling to know someone is watching you,” she said simply. Precisely the sentiment Tam had been feeling all afternoon while he was kicking around the museum. He felt overwhelmed by the desire to tell his sister about his mission. To inform her at least that he may never see her again. He wouldn’t tell her anything but that and say a proper goodbye, just in case. But he couldn’t, of course, he was being monitored by the agency. For this very reason. Another rider they’d added, specified the incidents of over-emotion due to anxiety that may lead an agent to consciously tell a loved one. This often occurs within 48 hours of embarking on the mission.
“Yeah,” he said his face now looking very sad.
“Sorry to worry you,” she sighed, “I don’t know what to do.
I know a few activists I was able to get in touch with. Basically they all said the same thing, they threaten you initially, with verbal intensity, or signs that they’re watching. As long as you don’t act further on telling the public, they stop.”
“Whose they??” he said frustrated. Rosemarie thought she’d heard his question wrong and narrowed her eyes in disbelief.
“Are you serious??” she asked laughing. “I forget how naïve you are little brother. You need to keep an ear and eye out yourself. You’re in the same line of work as me.” Tam had been instructed to tell friends and family he was still working with the Initiators.
“Well maybe there’s something I can do, or inquire from the agency--”
“No!” she said, “No, that’s the worst thing you can do. It’s all about surveillance,” she said hopelessly, "and what I'm finding is that there's no escaping it."
After a long silence in which both were pensive they turned the topics to lighter subjects which included Tam's mission. He had to inform her that it was a two-month mission in a remote part of Asia, which made him feel terrible. He felt terrible to have to lie to her and after hearing Rosemarie's encounter he felt terrible about what may lie inside the package he was to drop during his mission. He couldn't help thinking that Rosemarie would never have agreed to getting promoted into the Superiors and she wouldn't agree to many of the guidelines of the mission. He heart felt heavy his instinct was to rescue his sister and smuggle her in the time capsule with him. Of course, this was impossible. By the time he’d reached home he knew he’d have to toughen up and deal with it all.
Once home, he sat upon his bed and began to open the contents of his Night-Before package including fluids he had to drink, a change of clothing, which was fashioned to match the styles of an American in 1965.
